Friday, January 20, 2006

You must listen to "Age of Consent" by NEW ORDER while reading this.


- So I went with my parents and younger brother tonight back to Matchbox (second time this week). This place is amazing beyond words, and now my parents are all like "Honey, this can be our place", and "I feel so urban". They even remembered the doorgirl's name (which got us a great booth upstairs). As I was eating dinner something occurred to me. I really love my family. I know that this may sound cheesy, but some of the kids that I mentor have never known their fathers or known a mother that wasn't working 3 jobs to send them to a safe school. I guess this all really struck me when I ran into a guy I was pretty hot and heavy with a year ago. Ya see, if this meeting would have taken place a few years ago, I would have been totally scared out of my mind. A few years ago I was in a really bad place. I had just come out to my parents and had just moved to the city. I moved here with my parent's cash but not their blessing. They were worried about me, the all night parties, the lies, the mood swings. Originally, my purpose on moving to the city was to fuck as many guys as possible and get as fucked up as possible. Now that I lived by myself my mom's secretary wouldn't be calling my friend's places seeing if I was alive, my father wouldn't tip off the police to which car I was driving. I could be an "adult". But what I realized tonight was that I wasn't happy, I wasn't fucking sane. As cliched as it sounds, I found happiness tonight. My former flame was on a date and spotted my mother and I as we waited to use the restrooms. He came up and gave me this huge hug. This hug said so many things. The embrace moved from around the shoulders to the small of my back. It was an embrace of two men that had slept together, had brunch together, rented movies together, walked his dog together, had shared a part of their lives together. My mother was soaking in the whole thing. Here is her son, hugging a man, in public. When I realized that that my mother was watching, I quickly turned around. I didn't think twice and introduced her to XXXX. She said she was glad to finally meet him and told him how I talked about him and all this other embarrassing shit. Well, 20 minutes into my mother's conversation with the man I used to fuck, I told her that dad was probably getting antsy and sexually harassing a waitress so we should scoot upstairs. What does the saucy bitch do? SHE INVITES HIM UPSTAIRS TO MEET MY FATHER AND BROTHER! So as we climb the 2 flights of stairs up to the family, one thought crowds my brain, "I think my mom wants to see my ex naked". She managed to touch his bicept (for stability on those confusing stairs she says) no less than 5 times. At the landing I looked back and my mother and XXXX had stopped at his date's table to say hi and tell him that they would be back down. WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON??? So we finally make it to our booth and my mother, not I, introduces XXXX to my father and brother. They make small talk about the legal world for a few minutes and as I look at my mom, she looks at XXXX, he looks at me, my brother looks at his empty drink, and my father looks at my mom. It was amazing. He said his goodbyes to my fam and I went to walk him back down to his table. I had to physically force my mother into her seat because she wanted to walk down with us. So as I walk him down, he pulls me close and tells me I have such a great family and that he is in love with my mom. I met his look of sincerity with my look of pride. As we were approaching the bottom of the stairs, he asked me if I still had his number, I mouthed "Of course". I escort him to his table and make my ascent back upstairs. As I peek over the back of the booth I can see my mother's smile. It's a smile full of pride. She is proud of her gay son (and impressed he used to date such a stud as she later put it). I realized that night why I moved to the city. It wasn't to find as many hot guys as possible. It wasn't to find all the "right" parties. It was to find me. Well readers, I did find me. I found me in my mother's giggle, my brothers raunchy gay jokes and my father's conversation about real estate with the man I used to date. And I am happy. And of course, the dinner was amazing!

4 Comments:

At 4:35 AM, Anonymous Captain Peecock said...

well, well...a "serious" post. Corny, you be so...so...corny!!while of course it's nice to reflect on pleasant memories from the past and also bask in the serenity of the present, it's best to look ahead to what cards the future may hold. to what lies ahead. to what's really important in this great mystical labyrinth that we call "life"....

y'know, like 'tainin' that next batch o' schweeeet, brown luuuuuv! Oh, yeah, can u feel it?! there's gon' be a traffic jam on the Hershey Highway tonite!! yeeeehawwwwwww!!!........

 
At 4:44 AM, Blogger Cornelius said...

Please sir, take the syringe out of your arm.

 
At 5:01 AM, Anonymous C.P. said...

HA HA HA! What are you doing up at this un-Jesus like hour?

 
At 11:38 AM, Anonymous miss christy said...

awwwwwww. glad you had fun!

 

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